Hummingbird gecko

I am a 44 years old man, and I am experiencing a massive shamanic awakening in the last few weeks. Im reading books and listening to pods and audios about the topic. But this is not even close to whats going on. I need someone I could safely exchange some personal thoughts with. I want to confirm things and aask for further directions. Will appreciate to be contacted by an exeprienced person who has been into shamanism for a considerable amount of time and who feels a pull of intuition to reply to me with honest willingness to assist. Much appreciated it advance. DB