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  1. I lost my ally last month. She and I were very close for 18 years. She died and now is buried under the cypress trees. She kept me sane. Now, I am alone and things have really taken a nose-dive since. I feel out of it, ungrounded, uncentered and fearful of what may come. It is like the light has been shut off and in its stead a cold shadow has been cast over my heart and over my soul. I am walking as if sleepwalking and when I sleep it is a battleground. I toss and cannot find peace, even when there is nothing seemingly to bother me. My body is weak and wracked with pain. Day in and day out I
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